Its 5.07am.

It's cold and i'm sitting in a chair at 78km checkpoint 5 wrapped in blankets, face in my hand, a shattered and hollow man. I don't want to get up and the warmth of the heater and cup of soup feels really good right now. I'm ready to stop and pull out of the race.

Earlier, we were greeted with perfect blue skies for the start of this year's 100km race.

I started in an ok pace on the out and back 5km start section along a bitumen road and it was a great buzz to high five the kids as we ran back past the start line. I'm running with my sister (her first 100km) and we descend the Furber steps and we hug the ridge until we the ascend up the Golden Stairs, its steep and gets the heart racing!

My sister continues ahead of me and gains a few minutes as we arrive at the famous Tarros ladders, which is much better this year, minimal delays to descend.

I am joined and running with Kellie and Jason during this section of the course, great to have some company and we soon arrive at 31.6km checkpoint 2 and top my drinks and head out to my favourite section of the course, out to Ironpot Ridge, the traverse across local farms and ascent up Ironpot is hard work but beautiful and we were greeted by the beautiful sounds of didgeridoo playing on the ridge, it makes you appreciate the beautiful part of the world we get to explore in the race. Then the fun part, the descent off Ironpot.

It's not much further up the road I see my sister on her phone, she looks upset and is chatting to race medical doctor, she is struggling to run due to stomach issues.

We plan to continue and reassess at next aid station. We get our mandatory gear of phone thermal top checked and soon are at Six Foot Track checkpoint 3, 46km mark. My sister heads to the medical tent and chats to the team, it's getting dark so get out our torches and put on extra layers as the sun sets. My sister decides to continue on and we are rejoined by Jason, also in his first 100km event. We run the flat section after checkpoint 3 up until the incline of Nellies Glen, its wet underfoot and its a great relief to reach the top and out onto the streets of Katoomba. Its good to get indoors at the Aquatic Centre, refuel and i had been encountering some shin pain since the past checkpoint, so i get it assessed and strapped up by the physio. My sister also chats to medical team again about her ongoing health issues and makes the difficult decision to withdraw, we share a teary hug and i say 'The reason you are upset is because you trained so hard and care so much about the race', it was hard to watch.

Jason and I leave the Aquatic Centre soon after and out into clear, cool night air. The next section is a tough, but beautiful section of the course as the trail goes past Echo Point and descend the Giant Stairway with lots of undulating sections of stairs, its tough on the legs, with each passing step my shin pain is getting more intense. Jason is also struggling with the endless amounts of stairs and as we travel through Leura Forest we see other 100km runners heading the opposite direction towards the finish, there are few 'well dones', 'Keep going' between each of us. Jason's back is troubling him and he decides to withdraw midway between checkpoints, I make sure he is ok and i wish all the best and hope he comes back to the race next year. I continue on and finally gain a little reprieve of the endless once past Leura Cascades.

The temperature is dropping as the cool night has well and truly arrived, I'm struggling to keep warm despite i kept moving and having 4 layers include 2 thermal tops and polar fleece on. I message my wife to say i'm ready to stop. I arrive at checkpoint 69km at Fairmont and head indoors out of the cold, i'm struggling, with no energy (think it was due to illness during the week). I take some time, have something to eat. I finally get up and continue at a slow pace, shin is constantly causing pain, but i know this section is flatter than the previous section and I'm thinking well its only 9km to the next checkpoint. I'm shuffling along the streets and down the road to Queen Victoria hospital 78km checkpoint. It's now starting to be a race against time, with cutoffs now being a factor. As i approach checkpoint 5, there is a group of runners all within minutes of each other including Alf 75 year old runner. We finally arrive the checkpoint. I am certain I will stop and withdraw.

As i sit in the chair, I'm asked are you continuing on. I replied 'probably not, i have nothing to prove, I've done this event before and I've injured my shin' and continued to sip my soup and try and get warm. I am asked again a few minutes later' why are you still sitting there, get going, you will feel better 500 metres down the trail?' 'I feel sick, and not recovered from my illness during the week and i also need new torch batteries', I replied'. In that moment i realised i was just coming up with all these excuses to not continue. That was all the reasoning I needed to get out of the chair, just keep going and see how i would go. I left the final checkpoint with 10 minutes before cutoff .I think if I miss the time cutoff, at least i will finish not due to quitting at the checkpoint.

The sweeps, Sarah-Jane and Jane said i had 6hrs to finish 22km, which was going to tight considering i was unable to run due to my shin injury, my leg was swelling with each step.

I continue onto Kedumba Pass and descend into the valley towards Jamieson creek. I am soon joined by a couple of other runners and Sarah-Jane and Jane. They are constantly talking and keeping my mind off things, all the replies i can muster is 'Yep' to their questions as i keep going. They keep me updated on timing, i keep pushing despite the pain, I'm using my trekking poles to keep as much weight off my shin as possible. We arrive at emergency checkpoint at 91km, with majority now uphill to the finish, i have about 3hrs to complete the remaining kilometres. I continue through the sewerage treatment works and back into Leura Forest. The next 3-4km feel like they are taking forever,

I'm now getting closer to final kilometre, up the 951 furber steps. I start the climb up the steps and stop to take in the view for few seconds and admire the spectacular Blue Mountains.

I am nearly at the top of the stairs when I see Jackie, who said to me aren't you glad i got you out of the chair at the last aid station, i smile and give her a huge hug and then i see my sister at the top of the steps, I'm relieved to see her and give her big hug too. I now reach the boardwalk and despite the shin pain i run the last couple of hundred metres and receive a huge cheer as i round the corner to the finish line at Scenic World. I fist pump and jump across the finish line!

“The difference between winning and losing is most often not quitting.” - Walt Disney

At the end of the day when you do something which challenges you and you finish you get a sense of accomplishment, i wasn't really thinking this at 5.07am!

Main photo courtesy: Sportograf.com